My goal in life is to make a nigga feel the way Terrance Howard was feeling when Beyonce was giving him a lap dance
I’M TRYNA HAVE A NIGGA QUESTIONING HIS WHOLE LIFE EXISTENCE LIKE NICKI HAD DRAKE AFTER SHE GAVE HIM A LAPDANCE
me when i find out i have a substitute for my worst subject
the breakfast club isnt even about breakfast
you could have at least said spoiler alert
i only have two emotions
- yeah man
- nah son
do u ever smell weed and wonder where that chill person is
I like new friends because I can reuse old jokes
Shout out to girls who don’t mind being called dude and man casually
shout out to boys who don’t mind being called guuurrl
shout out to humans who don’t mind being called dawg
shout out to dogs who will let you call them anything so long as you say it in a happy, friendly tone.
Shout out to Guinea Pigs which are neither pigs nor from Guinea.
i hate when people r like “do you like them? oooh you’re blushing you do!!!” like, no you cold corndog im fucking blushing bc you’re embarrassing me and making me uncomfortable